The Secret Ways of Dark Lords (Extract)
by Chaos Greymistchild
Summary: Full Title: The Secret Ways of Dark Lords (And Other Homicidal Maniacs Bent On World Domination). Summary: When Bakura hears that Voldemort is still alive and upsetting the balance of the spiritual world, the Shadow Court decide that it would be best to investigate. Type: Extract.


**Title:** The Secret Ways of Dark Lords (And Other Homicidal Maniacs Bent On World Domination)  
 **Fandom:** _Yu-Gi-Oh!, Harry Potter  
_ **Rating:** T  
 **Type:** Extract  
 **Pairings:** None  
 **Warnings:** None  
 **Summary:** When Bakura hears that Voldemort is still alive and upsetting the balance of the spiritual world, the Shadow Court decide that it would be best to investigate.

 **Disclaimer:** Do I even need to say it?

 **Edit (8/1/2018):** I apologise. After some review of my work and the discovery of - shock horror - an actual working calendar of the events of OotP (I was using a mental one before) it has come to my attention that SWDL(AOHMBWD) - or SWDL for short - was horribly organised chronologically. Thus, it is with a heavy heart that I inform you all that I am in the process of rewriting it. It will take me a long time, and I have avoided it for a while to prevent it feeling like a chore, but eventually, I hope to unveil to all of you who enjoyed this extract the whole of SWDL (in an order that makes sense this time).

Thank you all for your favourites and views.

* * *

Harry shuffled awkwardly on his chair, mindful of all the chains on it just dying to wind around him – as much as inanimate objects can die anyways. He looked up through his fringe, silently begging for someone to help him and to get the whole thing over and done with already.

He gaped as Mage Ryou slammed the doors open and strolled through into the court room as if he owned it. Then his jaw dropped even lower when he realized what the other teen was wearing.

Mage Ryou had brushed back his usually wild hair so that it looked adorably fluffy but professional – an oxymoron if Harry had ever seen one – and was tied back in a low ponytail rather than being left to hang all over the place messily. He had also donned a black honest to god tailored suit jacket over a white dress shirt and black slacks. Oxfords with a slight heel adorned his feet. A pair of small oval glasses – spectacles, really – made his eyes seem bigger and softer, accenting his cuteness. He held a briefcase in one hand and had his other in a pant pocket. The whole outfit was slightly ruined by the odd eye embroidered in what looked like genuine gold thread, but Harry had never seen Yugi's silent guard so… _cute_ before. A double-take revised his opinion. The glasses hid a very sharp blade in his eyes and he had no doubt his many, many sharp things on person.

Harry gulped. Mage Ryou was all lawyer-y… presumably for _him_.

Ryou smiled slightly when he saw that the boy had caught the reason behind his glasses. He'd certainly never needed them – and never would – but they did a fantastic job at hiding the disdain he had for the facsimile of a court sitting before them. Even before he had become accustomed to the Shadow Court, he had had a certain respect for courts and the truth they sought – most of them at least. This one was the most corrupt one he had seen in a long, long time. There was no question of getting a fair trial. All he could do was humiliate until the desired result was achieved.

He walked up to Potter and bowed to him, completely disregarding the Wizengamot. "Potter," he whispered, in the lowest point of his bow, hidden from observers by his own body, "play along."

"Who are you?" A portly man sitting behind a desk asked self-importantly. Ryou blinked at him in surprise. _I… honestly expected better of the Minister for Magic_ , he thought, his mind stuttering to a halt briefly.

"Joey Wheeler," he said smoothly, a moment later, "I am the defense lawyer for Mr Potter,"

"This is a hearing for Potter!" The Minister retorted immediately.

Ryou just started blankly at him. "Mr Fudge," he said, surprise obviously coloring his voice, "I am well aware of that fact. As his defense lawyer, I am in charge of his defense _in his hearing_." he emphasized.

Fudge turned puce and the pink-obsessed woman next to him turned simpering. "Cornelius," she said, emphasizing her close connection to the Minister, "simply meant that surely a lawyer is not needed in a simple hearing."

Ryou shrugged. "I'm being paid for it, aren't I?" Then he promptly pulled out a wand, conjured a chair and desk and sat down, smiling gently all the while. "Please, do go on."

A red-head – a Weasley, Ryou realized in a horrifying epiphany – coughed pretentiously. Ryou wondered if the boy realized that he just sounded stupid instead of important. "You were listing the interrogators, sir."

"Yes, as I was saying, interrogators: Cornelius Oswald Fudge, Minister for Magic; Amelia Susan Bones, Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement; Delores Jane Umbridge, Senior Undersecretary to the Minister. Court Scribe, Percy Ignatius Weasley—"

"—Witness for the defense, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore," the aforementioned man said quietly from where he stood at the still open doors. He strode through the room just as comfortably as Ryou had and halted level with Harry and Ryou's desk, not looking at all phased to see the Mage there. Ryou had a few enjoyable moments watching Fudge squirm and stutter, trying to regain his dignity from where Albus had ripped it to shreds. Unfortunately, the show must go on, and Cornelius brought the hearing – trial, really – to order.

Albus conjured a squashy armchair to sit on. Ryou noted with some amusement that it was between him and Harry.


End file.
